Saturday, July 6, 2013

Comedy Of Errors

So I found this definition on the web, and it couldn't be more fitting:  Comedy of errors: A ludicrous event or sequence of events.  That was me yesterday.  Ludicrous meaning absurd or ridiculous as opposed to funny.

Thursday night I was just really depressed.  Sick and tired of being sick and tired.  So many people hurting.  So few people doing anything about it.  The economy.  The politics of everything.  I was just overwhelmed with life.

So I asked for prayer, and KNEW Friday would be a better day.  Um, not so much.

Thursday night we brought Snowball, my favorite bunny, in the house.  We have 2 rabbit cages outside now, and have 3 rabbits.  So we rotate having one in the mudroom to pet and play with.  So Thursday night it was Snowy's turn.  I knew right away something wasn't right.  He wasn't acting like his playful, silly self.

Snowball is out half-lop rabbit.  Only he's more of a half-half lop.  One of his ears hangs down, and the other is flipped over his head toward the other ear.  He's just sweet and precious.

But Thursday, something was very wrong.  Friday morning when I got up (Jacob was still sleeping, thank God) it became apparent that something was terminally wrong.  It was neurological in nature; I could tell by the way he kept trying to hold his head up, and trying to get up, but just kept falling over.

I called Doug in hysterics, and told him he had to come home and do something before Jacob got up and saw him like that.  It was just brutal.  I was just sobbing and sobbing.  Snowball was a "special" bunny.  He most likely had some other kind of deformation somewhere besides his ear.  But he was PRECIOUS. And he was mine.  And now he was dying.

So Doug came home and took care of it, and buried him under the apple tree.  Jacob, thank GOD, woke up and came downstairs JUST after Doug was done.  Then I had to explain to him why I didn't let him say goobye to Snowy.  It just plain stunk.

THEN, what I thought was a mosquito bite from the 3rd of July fireworks turned out to be some kind of cut all along the back of my knee...right where the line is from the bend?  Mmm-hm.  My darn legs are so swollen...especially the left one (the one with the gash) that I'm thinking, "Is it possible for skin to explode????"  Don't know how I'm going to deal with that.  Got gauze and a bunch of tape and medicine for boo-boos.  We'll see what happens. Doug says it's probably necrotizing fasciitis.  He's SO not funny.

So then I decide to take a shower.  Miss Mindy was here playing with Jacob outside, but I still had the doors to the bathroom shut.  After my shower (in which I nearly drown bending a little bit the wrong way to pick up the shampoo...water went in my trach and I horfed up a lung), the bathroom was so steamy and hot I could barely breathe.  So I looked outside to make sure they were still out there, and streaked through my office to shut the door to the living room so I could open the one bathroom door and get some air.  That helped a little.

Finish getting dressed.  Go to open the office door, and it will not open.  The door knob is just spinning.  Lovely.  Thankfully there was another way out and it opened from the other end!  I mean seriously....no one could even WRITE this stuff!  It's like a bad country song...."Woke up and my bunny was flip-floppin'....ain't gonna be no more hoppin'...then my knee exploded in back....looked like I had a razor attack....got locked in my office, the door knob just spun....Lord ya know that this just ain't no fun....."

And then you say, "well, at least it can't get any worse..."  Oh yes it can!

I had a few errands to run. Went to the Perrigo store to get Benedryl.  Closed.  {Sigh.} So I go to pick up my new glasses and sunglasses.  I haven't been able to wear sunglasses since I've had prisms in my glasses because my sunglasses don't have prisms and they make my eyes hurt and go cross-eyed if I have them on too long. (Holy long sentence, Batman!)

So I try on my new glasses, awesome.  Love em.  The guy says, "Can you see?"  I'm like, duh, they're brand new glasses, but I didn't say anything.

Then he came back with my new snazzy sunglasses.  I said, "Oh my gosh I'm so excited!  I squinted all the way here!  I've been looking forward to these sunglasses for you don't know HOW long!"  So I try them on.   I can't see.  I'm like REALLY?!??! At first I'm blinking my eyes, feeling like one has a huge smudge across my whole eye.  Nope.  They made the left lens wrong.  {Sigh}. Since it was Friday, almost 5:00, no one will touch them til Monday.

"....then I went to the doctor to pick up new eyes...they told me they're ready, but it's all been a lie...{make sure you're doing your best country twang}....My feet are so swollen, none of my shoes fit....Before anything else happens, I'm just gonna quit!"

Ba dum bum.



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