So Much On My Mind

Tina and the kiddos left yesterday, and I can't believe how really sad I am. I got used to having a girlfriend right here to talk to non-stop! And Jacob was having so much fun with the kids. A few scuffles, but much more fun.


We watched American Idol tryouts (don't know from when, they were on the DVR) and the last person we saw was a young man whose fiance was in a horrible car crash 2 months before their wedding. He said, "I was ready to say my vows, to love and to cherish, for richer or poorer, for better or worse, in sickness or in health. What kind of man would I be to walk away now?"


God BLESS you young man. (He could sing too!) THAT is committment and faithfulness. It also reminded me of my husband, and how almost the same thing happened to him. He said the vows FIRST, but then 2 months later I'm on my death bed, literally. And he honored his vows. That is so rare today. So many people think, well, if it doesn't work, we can always get divorced.


Doug and I don't let that even BE a possibility. We simply don't let the "d" word into our vocabulary. Sometimes I get really irritated with him...face it, it's marriage! We ALL get irritated with our spouses.

But really, look at what he has endured. Eleven years of a chronically ill wife. That is NOT easy. And (I know, believe it or not...) I can be a bit difficult at times. Really! It's true! I know you could never believe that from my docile personality....Yes, it IS getting deep in here!

Doug has been an amazing husband over the last 11 years. He has been my best friend, my confidante, my cheerleader, my nurse, my caregiver, my taxi driver, my carrier of medical equipment, my wheelchair pusher, my hand holder, my supporter, and the love of my life.

So. I am looking forward to some new opportunities as well as closing some doors to other things I thought would permanently be part of my life. (THINGS not people). Lots of weird things going on, lots of good things.

Things are finally looking up physically, and more importantly, emotionally. Trying to keep my chin up no matter what....we'll see what happens! I really am a hopeless optimist!