The Audacity

I am fuming. I watched the news this morning and saw a story about a Wal-Mart employee in New York being trampled to death as he was opening the doors on "Black Friday." I wanted to puke. A mob of greedy, selfish people literally stomped a man to death so they could be first to the best sales. What a tragic commentary on the state of our country. The good ol' USA, where you, too, can get the job of your dreams at Wal-Mart and be crushed to death by a bunch of "civilized" savages. UN-believable. All to "get a deal." I wonder what kind of bargain this man's family feels like THEY received. All to be first. It is so sad.

Another time I felt this way was when my son was born, and was in the NICU on a ventilator, fighting for every tiny breath, and my current pastor came up (about 1 1/2 weeks after Jacob was born) and told us about how the church was in a huge uproar and dividing over a softball game. Yes, a softball game. Now I would like to think I'm an open-minded, compassionate individual. But when I looked down at my son, lying on a pillow in my arms, with a tube down his throat so a machine could breathe for him....I almost lost it. I was filled with rage. It took all that I had not to scream and yell at the audacity of people to be so self-seeking and egocentric about a freaking BALL GAME, when MY SON was alive because of a machine. I was disgusted.

I am far from perfect, I will be the first to admit. I'm sure lots of people could name several character flaws in me. But these behaviors I just talked about take on a whole new level of self-centeredness. I cannot even fathom how this society's priorities got SO messed up. I mean, there's messed up, and then there's M-E-S-S-E-D up.

This world is crumbling and breaking and spinning out of control. The physical earth is damaged, and the people running it into the proverbial ground are greedy, self-regarding imbeciles. I'm just in awe at the lack of respect for human life on every level.

People using people, things, power, whatever they can to one-up the next guy. Seeking self-fulfillment, self-gratification, self-reliance. Self, self, self. God must look down and just weep at His once perfect planet and people. May He forgive us all.