Thursday, December 31, 2009

Attitude Check

Pardon me while I think out loud for a minute here. It's about time I list things I'm thankful for, because right now, I honestly would rather go into a corner and feel sorry for myself. My frustration level last night was about 90%...I have so much in my brain that I want to be doing. After all, my brain is still "normal." My mind is the same (well, ALMOST) as it was 15 years ago before I got sick. And it simply WILL NOT COOPERATE with my broken body. It refuses to accept, once and for all, that this illness has changed me. ALL of me.

I'm not sure how you can live with something for 15 years and not accept it. It's like every day I wake up, my brain just firing away at all of the things I want to do...and then it hits me again. "I can't" never used to be in my vocabulary; now it is necessary. I don't REALLY wish I had had MG my whole life, because I've done lots of cool things...but it's SO hard to lose something as vital as your independence.


* that God loves me whether I am able bodied or ill, and as Jacob would say, "He loves us even when we're naughty."

*that my husband has taken care of me for our entire marriage, that he has stood by me whether on the mountaintop (literally) or in the hospital bed

*that my son is healthy and smart and beautiful inside and out, that on my worst day, he can look at me with those adoring, big blue eyes and say, "I love you Mommy" and everything is right in the world again

*for friends who truly love me, who help me when I need it, and encourage me

*for pastors and laypeople who call to check on me and see how I am doing

*for my family, parents, sisters, brother, nieces and nephews, in-laws...I am blessed to have them

*for our first family vacation only 35 days away!!!

*for technology that allows me to keep in touch with people I would otherwise never talk to

*for my husband's stable job!!!

*for soldiers who willingly sacrifice everything for my freedom---God bless you and your families!

*for people who read my blog and encourage me with lovely comments! : ) (Sorry, couldn't help myself!)

God Bless everyone reading this...may 2010 be YOUR best year!


Rhonda said...

Visiting from SITS! Happy New Year to you!

Ma What's 4 dinner said...

Great attitude you! I'm inspired!

Stopping by from SITS. Happy New Year!

Alex aka Ma What's For Dinner

Priscilla said...

That's a wonderful list of items to be thankful for. Happy New Year!

Jamie Cooks It Up! said...

What a beautiful list.
Isn't gratitude the most amazing thing. I read a quote once that said "Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more."
The truth...said so simply.
Happy New Year.
Found you on SITS.
You go girl. You are an inspiration.
I also keep a family/personal blog separate from my cooking blog. It's nice to be able to write down some of the funny, crazy and touching things going on around here! It's fun to capture them, before I forget how I felt.
Have a great day!

Joanna said...

Love you mah friend!

How am I going to survive with you on vacation, btw?

Praying both of us has a better year.

Star Forbis said...

Happy New Year! And Happy Saturday Sharefest! Praying this is a good year for you.

Ing said...

Found your blog thru SITS. Positive attitude you have there! It's inspiring.

Wishing you a most wonderful year in 2010! Let it truly be your BEST year yet! God bless... :)

Christine B said...

Happy Saturday Sharefest! I'm visiting from SITS :) Wonderful list of 'thankfuls' -- stay positive!

Kimberly-mytoesareclaustrophobic said...

What a fabulous list of things to be thankful for! In my opinion being thankful is more than half the route on the road to happiness!

Just blog hopping from the SITS roll call.

Wishing you and yours a happy new year!

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