Drumroll Please......

I FEEL GOOD!!!

Two days in a row now....I don't feel like I could just crawl in bed and stay there for a month. It looks like this pheresis worked! I am so FLIPPIN' happy I could bawl. (I could bawl pretty much anytime, but, ya know...)

I even got dressed. Now THAT says something! Normally it's PJ day unless someone is coming over. Not today! Bra and everything. Go me!!!

So I got a call from Ann Arbor, and things are IN THE WORKS for the Rituxan treatments. I need to get some bloodwork done, and except for waiting for a spot to open up (cancer patients get priority which I totally get), we will be good. to. go. Woot Woot!

When I'm better, ya know the first thing I'm gonna do? I'm gonna DANCE. I'm gonna shake some bootay. I may only be able to dance for 5 minutes, but for that 5 minutes, I'm gonna BOOGIE!

I also got my printed blog-book in the mail, and I freakin' LOVE IT! No, it's not perfect, because there are typos here and there on different blog posts, but whatever! It's me in print, and I LOVE it.

So. That's about it for me right now...I'll keep ya posted!

Reality Smackdown

Nothing like getting hit upside the head with reality!

Wednesday I had another AWESOME day. I went to an old (as in known-forever, not age) friend's house for the day. I felt so good I was able to drop Jacob off at Shawn's, drive about 50 minutes to Linda's house, stay there til almost 5, and drive home! She made the most awesome lunch...AND dinner for me to take home. Plus she is making a bunch of meals for me to put in the freezer! THANK YOU LINDA! You ROCK!

Linda has such a beautiful house...so clean and NOT dusty and bright and nice decorations that aren't make of plastic or stuffed animals. She has two tiny little dogs that do not shed or even bark very much. I like the whole house, but the bathroom is AWESOME. It's painted bright teal, with white trim, and the back splash is like teal and chartreuse rectangles of glass, with white grout. It's so nice and bright and just simply lovely.

Linda was such a wonderful hostess...I just got to rest and relax and enjoy adult company. And it was so QUIET. Oh, the quiet. Peace. Quiet. {Sigh}.

Cut to pulling in my driveway:

My driveway is gravel, so of course dust is flying everywhere. Moose and Molly are barking hysterically, Moose running toward the van jumping on it, and Molly getting her chain all wrapped up on everything possible. I'm already abhorring the intrusion of this hideous barking on my peace-lulled brain. So I'm screaming at Moose through the window to get down. Thankfully, he does.

I'm wearing light khaki pants and and a nice pink shirt. Very bright and cheery.

And. Here. Comes. Blackie. It was like a bad movie in slow motion. I can see he's been in the pond, but he's muddier than I've ever seen him. Have you ever really looked at pond mud? It's black. And it stinks. Bad. It's frog crap for crying out loud!

So here's Blackie, wet, muddy, running at me like a bat out of h#!!, and I can see it happening, super slow-mo, and I yell "Noooooooooooo" and he jumps up against me. (You KNEW it was going to happen!)

I leave everything in the car and go into the house to get changed, and throw my clothes in the washer right away. I can already smell the nasty pond mud smell on me. Eeewww!!! I get changed, mumbling under my breath how I should just get back in the van and run away, back to the quiet, clean environment from whence I came.

I get my walking stick since I'm going out into the yard to find my son. I hear Doug on the tractor, so I know Jacob's not far behind. (Blackie, by the way, is howling away in his cage.) I go out the door, head toward the tractor sounds, and stop dead in my tracks as I come around the garage.

Doug is on the tractor, backing into the pond and pulling the bottom mud out and down the yard. He's apparently making the pond BIGGER. (If you will recall, he made the pond for the ducks which we no longer have. One DROWNED (how the heck does a duck drown??) and the others either ran away or got eaten. Even so, we clearly need a larger pond.)

I see Jacob, HIP DEEP walking back and forth through the muck piles that Doug has scraped out of the pond. Jacob sees me and starts running toward me. I was like, Ohhhh NO you don't! So I put my arm out and caught his head in my hand. He runs back to the mud, laughing like a little wild man, chasing and catching frogs.

I saw Doug, and just shook my head. Jacob comes up to me with a HUGE frog he just caught. I was like, um, no thanks. So he put it in his "bug cage" and wants to come in. I don't even let him up the steps into the mudroom before we get his clothes off. Shoes: black. Socks: black. Jeans: black. Smell? Repulsive! Then there's the muddy frog cage he won't release from his tight little grasp.

I get his naked butt into the tub, and let him put the frog on the hamper in the bathroom (Hey, he wanted it in the TUB with him!!) Got Jacob hosed down in the shower, then made him soak in the tub...for 3 hours. Just kidding. It was more like 15 minutes.

Doug came in rather sheepishly, apologizing over and over. I was like, hey. He's a boy. He's catching frogs. He will remember this day forever. What boy wouldn't want to grow up in a place like this where he can run and play and jump in the mud and catch frogs? Yeah. Too bad Mommy has to live there too!!!

The juxtaposition was almost more than I could bear. I couldn't have written a more perfect set-up for my return from the pristine day of visiting to the return to the middle of the sticks.
Well, at least I know my son is having a happy childhood. In the end, that's really the most important thing. Right???

Oh What A Day!

Wow. I cannot believe how good I am feeling! Hallelujah! It was but a mere 2 1/2 weeks ago that I thought I would never feel good again. Honestly. I was to the point where I was like, this is it. Discouragement, frustration, even anger abounded!

It has been so long.

I honestly feel better than I have in over 5 years. I'm so thankful. I'm so grateful.

I'm SO BLESSED.

I will struggle with MG until the Lord sees fit to heal me, whether this side of heaven or once I'm there. Either way, I feel like I'm getting a little glimpse of what it would be like to be healthy.

Trach aside, yesterday seemed like such a NORMAL day!

I curled my hair for the first time since I can remember. (It's been since before Jacob was born, I know that).

I wore a necklace for the first time in a long time.

I felt pretty for the first time in a loooooong time.

I dropped Jacob off at Doug's work while I ran to the chiropractor, BY MYSELF.

We went to the store at 5:00PM AFTER all the other events of the day thus far, and I was FINE.

I came home, did the dishes, cleaned up the table, straightened the bathroom a little bit, and put potatoes in the oven.

Some of you may be thinking, so what? I do that and more every day. (You probably haven't been reading my blog long!) : )

Can I just ask all of you one thing? PLEASE don't take life for granted. Every day, every minute....every breath is a miracle to me. I keep telling everyone how amazing it is to breathe! They look at me kinda funny, but they understand, because they've seen me struggle.

Struggle to get up the stairs.

Struggle to walk out to the car and get in.

Struggle to take care of my child.

Struggle to just breathe.

So today....hug your child, your spouse, your sister, friend, dog, cat, whatever! Just show love to someone, let them KNOW you love them, and take time to really appreciate the mundane. You never know when it may become the miraculous!